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Getting married was such a beautiful experience! But as someone with anxiety, I had to find ways to manage it on my wedding day. So, here are 4 anxiety management tips for your wedding day.
Well, it’s officially been one year since I got married! It’s gone so quickly and so slowly at the same time.
Now, I’m so glad that I got to experience getting married, I’m also happy it’s in the past because it was a lot of planning. And I’m just not someone who enjoys planning too much.♀️
And since I’m also pretty anxious by nature, I had to also plan taking care of myself into my wedding day.
If that’s something you relate to, here are 4 tips for managing anxiety on your wedding.
First of all, getting clear with my then-fiancé now husband was crucial in managing my anxiety.
So, before our wedding week began, we got on the same page about all the ways I would need his support to manage my anxiety as a team.
For example, since our wedding was in his hometown of France, I knew that there would be times I would need him to communicate in French for me. Even though I’m fluent, I knew that with the stress of the wedding I might stumble in French.
So, I told him that I would need him to jump in more often than normal for me to help me express myself when I needed him.
Also, we did a lot of discussing how we would manage any anxieties I had in the friends and family department. For me, this was the most important area to address. So, we came up with specific game plans that helped me feel at ease.
When I verbalized any anxieties to him, he was better able to help me manage it.
When I look back at what made my wedding day extra amazing, it was really the people who supported me in making it happen.
Since I didn’t hire a wedding coordinator, I relied on my close friends and family to help make things happen. However, one of my sisters was a wedding planner for five years, so that was a HUGE plus.
During the planning, my husband and I listed everything we would need help with. Then, we thought of people who we thought would be a good fit to help, or who would want to help with each task.
After that, we consulted to see if they were on board with helping out (they were!) and divvied out tasks that way.
And like I mentioned above, I put everything into a schedule and sent it to my people, my A-team, my tribe.
In fact, on the day that they were setting up the tables, they told me to go away and relax lol.
So, when the day rolled around, I knew that everything would be taken care of, and I wouldn’t have to worry.
Next, it’s important to identify what you know will make you the most stressed on your wedding day.
For me, I know that my mood can quickly go down the drain if I’ve gone too long without eating. And no one wants a hangry bride, right?
So, I was very clear about when and what I would eat on my wedding day- specifically breakfast and lunch. Since dinner was our big catered event, I knew I could count on it.
Also, I even told my A-team exactly when I would be eating so they could help support me in it. Did I even write it into the schedule that I sent everyone? Oh, yes I did! Lol.
This means my mom knew at 11 a.m., it was her job to make me a sandwich. Then give it to me before I got into the car to head to the church. (Thanks Mom!)
Now, I know this might sound intense to some of you. But since I knew I could count on my meal times, it helped me feel less anxious.
So, whatever your big stressor is, make sure you come up with ways to address it. Then get support from your A-team in executing it.
Next, this one was very important.
Since a wedding is an exciting event, everyone wants to be a part of it. But sometimes, well-meaning friends or family get in the way of the flow of the day.
And it can be hard for people to understand just how much you’ve planned to make it your special day.
So, there are times you can give into people’s requests, and there are times when you just can’t. And it’s those times that you have to be very firm with people.
If saying no to loved ones is something you struggle with, I wrote a blog post with a few questions that make it easier for me to say no here.
For instance, we had a schedule for all the different groups of guests who would take pictures with my husband and I. And one of our relatives was adamant about taking the first picture with us. But we had already started lining everyone up, so we just needed this person to go with the plan. While it caused a minor conflict, we stayed firm and moved on.
This is another area that I spoke to my A-team about beforehand. Since it’s hard for me to be firm with people, it helped me be able to stay firm knowing that I had a team of people to back me up when I needed to set a boundary.
To wrap things up, I’m so grateful that my wedding day went well despite my anxiety. I know a lot of that was because of the support I had. But also because I got clear with my own needs beforehand.
Obviously, we still had our fair share of drama and things were NOT perfect. But overall, everything went smoothly.
What helped you manage your anxiety before your wedding? Tell me in the comments!
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